Saturday, June 29, 2013

Christian Women Go in for the Kill on a Natural Hair Forum? Where's the Respect?

I must say that Friday afternoon and evening were quite an experience for me on Facebook.  Without naming the name of the Facebook forum, I will only say that the forum is for swapping and selling natural hair and skin products.  While a great forum for learning about products and getting the chance to try out products, I've never swapped or sold there.

Yesterday afternoon a woman posts "Can We Have a Praise Break? Let's Give God The Glory for a Sec! Go!"

I know some of you will think 'What is wrong with that?' or 'Yes! Yes! Give Him some praise!' but stay with me for a second.  This forum is not a religious or faith based forum.  It's a forum for HAIR AND SKIN products, and has members from all over the US, possibly the world.  That means that there are bound to be members who believe different, and who will feel uncomfortable that a neutral space has taken on a religious slant.

Indeed someone was uncomfortable, and she posted, asking why does religion have to come up in the group considering it was a hair forum (I'm paraphrasing).

The members in the forum became berserk.  The responses were remarkable to say the least (the misspellings are the posters', not mine):

"Its relationship not religion"

"Sorry ,you dont have to respond on certain post love"

"We bind the hands of the enemy with the BLOOD OF JESUS!!!! He has No AUTHORITY for WE HAVE THE VICTORY!!"

"Let the fire forever burn in our spirit Lord and never forget the very foundation of our existence is because of you."

"Um, (name removed) don't waste your breathe or time just exit stage left. No one is forcing beliefs upon you or anyone else. The OP asked for a praise break and she got it from those who believe.”

" No one is forcing anything on anyone!!! And If someone says lift tje name of Jesus, I WILL!!! I didn't even see where it was posted I saw WOMEN LIFTING THE NAME OF JESUS!"

"If a person doesn't believe in God. Don't read the thread. We don't all have to agree on religion but respecting a person views is the key. On that note. Thank u Jesus for keeping me and my family safe in good health and providing for us and thank u for these great group of women." 

It was terrible.  One said she wouldn't buy the woman's hair products, and another said she would, but would pray over it.  They tried to claim the problem was her rudeness and attitude, but I don't believe that for a second.  They got huffy-puffy because they felt she attacked their God, their Jesus, their Christ, and they promptly put on their battle armor.  Others threatened to leave the forum if praise and worship became forbidden.

What they failed to realize is when the post about a 'Praise Break' went up, the forum ceased being a neutral place where anyone of any faith or belief could comfortably belong.  The poster and her co-signers turned the forum into their personal praise and worship center without regard to the feelings of others, and assumed everyone in the forum was of like beliefs. When someone objected, that person was ostracized.  In this instance, members posted that she did not have to read the post, or the she didn't have to comment on it. There were references to Satan and the Devil.  Where was the respect for this woman, or for anyone else in the forum who was of a different religion/belief/non-belief, sense many wanted to post about respect?  Why bring something as personal as religion into a public, neutral space?

If the OP (original poster) needed a 'Praise Break', the best places to have had one would be her personal Facebook page, a Facebook forum for the purpose of praise and worship, her church, or privately with friend who share her beliefs in a chat room.

Personally, these women were 'un-Christian-like' to me - no compassion, no respect, no thoughtfulness.  They went in for the kill like a pack of hungry wolves.  They invaded a space and had no qualms about it.  They lacked the sense of 'there's a time and a place for everything'.  It's disrespectful, divisive, ignorant, and annoying.

I left that forum.  After seeing that, I know that place isn't the place for me.  The response from the woman who bravely voiced her opinion to the 'Praise Break' post, as well as a subsequent post on the matter were deleted while the actual 'Praise Break' post is still there. On top of that, a member created a Facebook page for praise and worship as a result of the incident.  Maybe all of them are there now - the APPROPRIATE arena for that.


  1. Excellent recital of the facts of the case and analysis of behaviors. Loved it.

  2. Thank you for this article. I believe this type of thing needs to be addressed as being apart of the natural community and most of us are women of color that people assume we share the same belief system. I am apart of the so called group and I read though the posts, not one bit surprised at the ignorance and the christian "attack" on the woman who voiced her intelligent reaction.

    We unite over some things, but seem to be torn apart by others.

  3. Thank you Deborrah and Rachel for your comments. It is very true how we can be united over something and torn apart by others. It definitely needs to be addressed that all women of color don't believe the same - it is ignorant to assume that we do.