Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Friends Versus Acquaintances

Sometimes I am amazed at who people choose to be their friends. Granted, you learn from experience who should be a friend, and who merely should be an acquaintance, but sometimes I believe that people are taking too long figuring out who is who.

I have a small group of friends, and there are reasons this wonderful group of women are my friends.

They are loyal, trustworthy, and respectful of themselves and others - for three things. They possess a positive, bright aura, and are there for me when I need them. They encourage, and will tell me the truth. I look forward to hearing from them or seeing them. We may be busy, but we always find a way to keep up with one another.

Don't you feel all fuzzy inside, now?

Well, acquaintances are different.

Acquaintances know me, are cordial to me, and hang out with me, but have no loyalty to me. I can't trust them to keep my secrets, or anything I say to them, to themselves. They may gossip, gossip, and gossip some more. When things become hard for me mentally, financially, or otherwise, I can't count on them for support (but they'll tell everyone about the hard time I am having). They can be so negative that I am exhausted being around them. These people only are good for general, surface conversation.

I'm not saying all acquaintances act like this (some people are acquaintances because you just haven't gotten to know each other better to decide any other way). I'm talking about the ones delegated to the friend category, but you have trust issues, honesty issues, or any other negative issues ALL THE TIME.

We need friends; life is so rich with them, but you have to choose wisely. The sooner you find out what a real friend is, and begin re-delegating the people in your life, the better off you'll be mentally, physically, and more.

What do you look for in a friend? Do you consider yourself a good friend?


  1. Nowadays, it's hard to distinguish between freind from foe. It seems like everyone has an agenda, when they need something from you, you are their friend.

    A friend can be someone you least expect.

    1. I agree that today it is harder to tell a friend from a foe. I say if a particular person remains around when you are at your worst, that one is a keeper!

  2. Mmmm, good suggestion. And you know what, is very true. Case in point I posted a funny picture on my facebook page, people I least expected wanted to know what was wrong. Whereas, those I‘ve known for years...just didn't care. It was a joke, but at least they thought enough as a friend to say “what going on,” “calm down.” That meant a lot.

    How did you become so wise in all of your young years Dana lol

  3. Telecia, I had two defining events that gave me that wisdom, as well as hearing about others' experiences. :-)

  4. I think we don't have natural foes or natural friends. Friendship is a relation, it occurs between at least two persons, and is almost a commercial relation: what we (want to) give, what we (like to) receive. If we are honest (or skillful, of course) in this trade, we may think we have friends - you see? I specified "to be" and "to have". These are the poles of our life; we define ourselves by these two verbs. The balance... oh, the balance is a whole different story, but it's what makes a life enjoyable or hateful.

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  6. Vazul,

    Where do emotions fit into your equation?

  7. In "to be". If there is a feature like "emotional being". :)